Inner Work with Rume Dedekuma

Welcome to a different version of The Interior Work Collection: What Therapists Need You to Know, a set of quick interviews that characteristic grounded knowledge from actual therapists. 

As we speak I am honoured to characteristic Rume Dedekuma, a Registered Provisional Psychologist who makes use of a person-centered, trauma-informed, and integrative method to assist people transfer nearer to their therapeutic targets.

Interview with Rume Dedekuma, Calgary Therapist

Q1. What’s one mindset shift you usually assist your shoppers make?

Some of the highly effective mindset shifts I assist shoppers make is transferring from a zoomed-in to an aerial perspective.

Give it some thought: after we’re struggling, it is simple to get misplaced in a single tiny element of our drawback.

We develop a perception—possibly one thing we heard rising up, or a message from social media—that this one perception defines our complete story. It makes us really feel caught, like there aren’t any different choices.

However what when you may take a step again and see the larger image? I invite my shoppers to think about they’re in a helicopter, trying down on their life. From up there, you see the entire panorama—the valleys, the mountains, and all of the paths in between.

You discover particulars you could not see from the bottom, and all of a sudden, that one drawback appears to be like lots smaller within the context of your complete journey.

This shift opens up new prospects and helps you notice that your story is way richer and extra advanced than a single perception.

Q2. What’s one small behavior or every day motion that helps with emotional resilience?

Emotional resilience is not about being powerful or by no means feeling something. I see it as a fluid, dynamic course of.

It is about having the self-awareness to know what you want in any given second. An excellent behavior for constructing that is embracing the knowledge of Maya Angelou’s quote: “Do the most effective you may till you recognize higher. Then when you recognize higher, do higher.”

This can be a lovely, compassionate way of living. Your “finest” will change relying on what’s occurring round you.

On a anxious day, your finest would possibly simply be getting via it. On a great day, it is likely to be making an attempt a brand new, wholesome behavior.

This quote reminds us to be type to ourselves whereas additionally holding ourselves accountable to develop and break away from previous patterns that not serve us.

Q3. What’s one query you would like extra individuals requested themselves (or their therapist)?

I want extra individuals would get curious and ask themselves, “What can I study from this expertise?”

Our feelings are like a classroom, and each is a lesson ready to be realized. As an alternative of operating from troublesome emotions, attempt to method them with curiosity.

As an example, if an interplay leaves you feeling upset, your physique is likely to be making an attempt to inform you one thing vital a few boundary that must be set.

If you happen to really feel a robust emotion a few scenario, it may very well be highlighting certainly one of your core values.

The purpose is not to overanalyze every thing however to take what you may from the expertise and transfer ahead.

Consider it as a course you have accomplished—you study the fabric, then you definitely transfer on to the subsequent. Generally you would possibly must repeat a course, however the purpose is all the time to develop.

An excellent query to ask your therapist is, “What’s your principle on change and therapeutic?” This helps you perceive their therapeutic type and if it is the suitable match for you at this level of your journey.

This autumn. Suggest a favourite useful resource:

Discovering the suitable sources could make an enormous distinction.

For individuals who cannot entry remedy or wish to complement their periods, I all the time advocate the Centre for Clinical Interventions. They provide a unbelievable assortment of free, evidence-based workbooks on subjects like anxiousness, despair, and self-compassion.

The most effective half is in addition they have sources on find out how to assist others, which is so vital.

A fast however vital notice: not each useful resource will apply to you. It is best to take what works and go away what does not.

You’ll be able to all the time overview the sources together with your therapist if you’re unsure about something.

One other useful resource I really like is the weekly publication from James Clear, the writer of Atomic Habits. It is a quick, insightful learn that gives a second of reflection and a dose of inspiration. It is a easy, low-effort method so as to add a bit of private improvement to your week.

Q5. What’s one fantasy about remedy you’d like to bust?

One of many greatest myths I might like to bust is the concept “issues aren’t dangerous sufficient for me to wish remedy.”

We have a tendency to think about remedy as a final resort, one thing you solely do whenever you’ve hit all-time low.

However what if we noticed it extra like preventive care? You do not wait on your automotive to interrupt all the way down to get an oil change, proper? You do not wait to be sick to go for a yearly check-up.

Remedy generally is a proactive instrument that will help you keep mentally wholesome, construct emotional abilities, and navigate life’s challenges earlier than they grow to be a disaster. It is about sustaining your well-being, not simply fixing what’s damaged.

Discover Rume Dedekuma

Loved studying Rume’s insights and solutions to the above questions? Please go to Rume’s web site, aponicounselling.com and extra hyperlinks beneath to attach with him and study extra about his work.

Rume’s Hyperlinks:

Website | Psychology Today Feature | Instagram

Thanks for studying! If you happen to appreciated this content material, share with a buddy: